Okay sweetie, the wine mosquito is a new device that allows you to extract wine through the cork using a high-tech needle "gizmo" without actually opening the wine or allowing any air to get into the bottle! This means you can sample wines and put them back in the cellar (for the long-term). Oh, it works, alright. We've been running rigorous tests on hundreds of bottles for several years now. When I say rigorous, I mean rigorous. We're scientists dammit. I'm talking about controlled studies. You know, disprove the null hypothesis and all that. Please! The wine mosquito is not yet available in stores, but we're working on it (e.g. yes, it is patented). If you want to know more or want to write and tell us how cool this is, please feel free. Paul Giammati does. Maybe we can keep a wait list so people can sign up and...wait.