Poem One
>X-PH:
V4.1@cornell.edu (Cornell Modified)
>From: "CrappyPoetry.com" <Scott@CrappyPoetry.com>
>Date: Thu, 16 Sep 1999 09:12:57 -0500
>Subject: CrappyPoetry.com presents...The Watching Hour
>To: skg8@cornell.edu (Sarah Katherine
Gordon)
>Sender: Scott@CrappyPoetry.com
>Reply-To: Scott@CrappyPoetry.com
>X-Mailer: LightningMail v0.62c (c)1999 fVast.
>Organization: Crappy Poetry International
>
>Good day to all and welcome to the Thursday edition of the Crappy Poem of
the Day. We are excited to announce
>that today's selected poem is from Alan Rose, the author of a previous
Crappy Poem entitled "Dances With
>Wasps." It should be noted that Alan is the first poet to have
two poems
published by http://CrappyPoetry.com We
>feel that this speaks volumes about the crappy quality of his work.
>
>As some of you may remember, Alan is from England. It is so nice to
add
an international flavor to our collection of
>crappy verse. In honor of mother England, we intend to drive home
tonight
on the wrong side of the road. And now,
>the poem...
>The Watching Hour
>
>Soft breaks the moonlight
>on your pillow,
>Dancing through your hair,
>My heart runs fast
>as I sit still
>to watch you sleeping there.
>
>When moonbeams fade
>I fly with daybreak,
>At your side no more.
>Oh! How I wish you
>were my girl friend,
>And not the man next door.
>
>Submitted by Alan Rose
>
___________________________________________________________________
>Let's see what our resident critics are saying about "The Watching Hour."
>
>"It's fantastic to see a male poet unencumbered by society's
artificially
imposed rules regarding gender as it relates
>to the appreciation of beauty. We see the 'Watcher' bravely embrace
his
feminine side even as he longs for a more
>traditional female subject for his admiration ."
>-Marie Solo
>Marie@CrappyPoetry.com
>
>" I hope this doesn't mean Alan has gone 'Somewhere over the
Rainbow.'"
>-Chuck Farley
>Chuck@CrappyPoetry.com
>____________________________________________________________________
>Again, thanks to Alan for his fine piece. Per his request, his $3.00
prize will be in the form of a cold one waiting for
>him at an airport bar here in the States. His only condition is that
it
not be anywhere near the Altantic coast. Come
>now, Alan. Your countrymen survived the Battle of Britain. What
would
Churchill say about this attitude toward a
>mere hurricane?
>
>Tomorrow's poem of the day could be yours! Submit your crap now at
http://CrappyPoetry.com
Poem Two
>X-PH: V4.1@cornell.edu (Cornell Modified)>From: "CrappyPoetry.com" <Scott@CrappyPoetry.com>>Date: Tue, 21 Sep 1999 09:35:49 -0500>Subject: CrappyPoetry.com presents..."The Value of X">To: skg8@cornell.edu (Sarah Katherine Gordon)>Sender: Scott@CrappyPoetry.com>Reply-To: Scott@CrappyPoetry.com>X-Mailer: LightningMail v0.62c (c)1999 fVast.>Organization: Crappy Poetry International>>Coming to you live, from the overpriced and poorly lit offices ofhttp://CrappyPoetry.com it's the Crappy Poem of the>Day.>>Today's poem is from Kristin. She didn't submit her last name, perhaps toprotect herself from the instant fame that>comes from being selected as the Crappy Poet of the Day. Who knows if herfirst name is even Kristin? Who>knows if she's even a female...or if she even wrote this poem?>>Since we have no other information to go on, let's just imagine Kristin asbeing 24 years old, 5 foot 10 inches tall,>135 pounds, tossing her silky hair over her shoulder as we read hercrappy poem entitled, >The Value of X>>Counting on my fingers>Beneath my desk>To avoid the superior stares>Of those who can count>In their heads.>>English and math>Merging to make x>Make up your mind>Do I read you>Or count you?>>Do you feel bad>That you only have dumb words>Like x-ray and xylophone>Given to you?>>Wake up X,>You no longer mark the spot>No one likes you anymore>Little x>>Submitted by Kristin
________________________________________________________________________ >Let's see what the critics are saying about "The Value of X...">>"Kristin has struck a chord with her audience...'The Value of X' is aboutthe unknown and the natural human>tendency to fear the madness and randomness of our world. Kristin's voiceshouts above the din of the chaos...she>is a prophet, a seer, and yes, a poet.">>~Marie Solo>Marie@CrappyPoetry.com>>"Instead of 3 dollars let's send her a handful of change and see if shecan count it.">>-Chuck Farley>Chuck@CrappyPoetry.com________________________________________________________________________ Kristin, your $3.00 in nice, crisp bills is on the way. We hope that youwill put it to good use...perhaps treating>yourself to lunch. Let's see if a bean tostada is 79 cents, how manytostadas could Kristin have for lunch with her>crappy $3.00 prize?>>.79(x)=3>>Good luck.>>Tune in tomorrow for the next installment of The Crappy Poem of the Day.Be sure to submit your poem at>http://CrappyPoetry.com>>And now, our sponsor...>>**CityNet.com**>Find out what's going on in your town. Visit http://CityNet.com Movielistings, weather, classifieds, chat.