Secret Admirer 11/13/03
I guess what I'd like to see is more full-length reviews and just marginally better sentence structure—or something, I can't put my finger on it. Like Vern's grammar is awful, but it works, because it's schtick. And you know damn well that it's a STYLE, not just that he's too lazy to put together a sentence.
I'm not saying you are, but sometimes that's how it comes across. A good example of why your work gives me fits is your BARRY LYNDON review. You have some great insights here, you obviously know more about The Art of The Films of Cinema, as Vern would say, than I ever will—but it comes across like it was written by a very bright fifth grader. If you're writing for yourself, that's fine. But the 'ratis would want to see more.
Assuming you give a shit, and it's perfectly OK if you don't. But stuff like this: Referring "the big red-headed guy", tell us who the character is. Use of padding words, like "FIRST, there is the battle..."
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