yeah yea.  You actually got me interested in seeing whether I could find a fix.  I have some ideas.

I think the way to solve this problem is to think of reasons people might want to stop/pause/turn down the music.  And go from there.

so:  for example.  I think the biggest reasons people tend to want to stop music is

1.) it's surprising and they need a second to adjust to the shock

2.) they want to turn it down

3.) they want to pause it

3.) they want to start it over

4.) they can't concentrate on reading/listening at same time (i.e. want to stop it, but maybe only temporarily)

5.) They hate it.  We don't care about these people.

So.  I think the best thing to do is to do like on MySpace except make it not stupid-looking:  a little java controlly that has "play," "pause," "stop." Up in the corner.  On every page that has music.  Make it small.  You'll have to get used to it. 

I think you can do it (a la MySpace) where it's embedded and it starts automatically, but a person can easily take control if a person wants.

(Interestingly, I looked up my friend John Vanderslice's myspace page and am delighted to find that his song doesn't auto start. Not that I would have a problem with his music doing that because I like his music.  But I hate Tory Amos which is why I get mad when I visit my friend Mike Blum's myspace.  Gah!  Vanderslice = high class@!)