Bastard!


You don't merit more of a response, but here it is. These are two of many grievous things I read on your web pages. I focus only on the Anthony Lane grievances.
"oh I don't know. I can't remember his actual argument. And I'm not reading it again. I will do my best to summarize. It's something like 'People like 'The Sound of Music,' but it's a bad film. Chinatown is a good film. My name is Anthony Lane.'"

"I've not read Lane's comments on either film, but if he tried to say 'Schindler's List' was as good as 'Saving Private Ryan,' then that's ridiculous. Ridiculous. [followed by drivel that ends with the declaration that Matt Damon and color make Ryan a better movie]"
What bothers me the most about your commentary on Anthony Lane is not that it is trite (at least unapologetically so), poorly thought out, and poorly expressed. What bothers me the most is that it shows up as one of the first several links wrt Anthony Lane when one searches for him on Google. I guess a great point can be made here about the democracy of the web. I don't care to make that point. I love Anthony Lane. I recommend his reviews and opinion to many of my friends. Your attacks amount to the attacks of an eight year old bully when, based on what else you seem to have read, I would have expected more from you. After all, no expectation can rightly be made of me - I am just your reader. I have the right to think whatever the fuck I want about what you write. You published it for me to read. You exposed yourself.

Don't take it too personally. I know nothing about you other than what you've posted on your unsightly website. It really looks to me like you wrote most of your site while under the influence of some substance or other, then didn't have the common decency to go back and edit yourself before assaulting the world. You're like the sci-fi writer who begins stories with something like: "I came to in an empty white room with no memory of how I got there." You erase that shit afterwards when you actually have something to say. If you don't have anything to say worth spending some time and energy expressing it, why are you publishing it in the first place? Everybody's opinion doesn't matter equally. You have to earn my respect in order for yours to matter more. All you've done with your website is destroy any real hope of me taking you seriously or most anyone else that actually expects not to have their time wasted when they go looking for someone else's opinion.

And don't be too impressed with yourself for the large number of links. From what I can tell, your writing excels at one thing and one thing only: linkability. You sprinkle in enough random topics and images to make yourself halfway attractive to the million idiot search engines out there. Then again, you also seem like the kind of person who has a lot of other friends who like to entertain themselves by posting their own half baked thoughts on the web.

Whittle yourself down a little more. And pay attention to the actual interview with Anthony Lane that appears on the web - fact checking is good! His book was called "Nobody's Perfect". If you aim to be a web-based embodiment of the postmodern unreliable narrator, well congratulations! All you did was graduate to Dave Egger's shitty level of writing skill.

In general, I am annoyed by people who think they have to put every half baked thought they've ever had on the web. I am even more annoyed when they are surprised by the fact that they receive potshots as well as praise. Yes, I am aware that I just characterized my own criticism as a potshot.

Happy now?

Different D